08 February 2012

Are you a Christian?

Sacrifice of Isaac (1635)
Most Americans claim they are, but are they? There are numberless Christian sects in the US, and all over the world for that matter. They all differ in what they consider Christian and what not except for one major point: they almost all agree that they are right, and that all the other Christians are wrong.

Only the viewpoints of their particular sect are the right ones, the others are sorely mistaken. As a result, Catholics claim that Protestants are not going to be "saved" because they are not following the apostolic succession, Protestants unite in claiming that Catholics aren't even Christians to begin with, and so on.

Worse still, members of these different sects are eminently willing to murder each other over such differences. One only needs to look at Northern Ireland [4] for an example of such charming Christian behaviour.

When confronted with people who claim to be Christian while mutually accusing their fellow primates at the other side of the table of not being Christians, the onlooker must be bewildered and confused. Nevertheless, there is a simple test, and it comes straight from the Bible.

When God asked Abraham to kill his son Isaac and make him a burnt offering to God, Abraham did not protest, asked no questions and took his son for a long walk to the mountain with the altar where he was to offer Isaac. Better still, he made Isaac carry the wood for the fire. What a joyous walk this must have been!

In the end, Isaac got off unharmed, because God provided Abraham with a ram to slaughter and burn. [1]

To the non-Christian, this seems an obscenely cruel story. Not so to the Christian. In fact, this story is one of the most celebrated in Christianity, and most all Christian sects agree that Abraham did precisely what he should have done.

Finding out whether or not a person truly is a Christian, therefore, is rather easy. It is sufficient to ask the self-proclaimed Christian if he or she would kill her or his own child if God asks for it.

There are essentially four possible replies to this simple question:
  1. Yes, I would kill my daughter or son
  2. I don't know whether or not I would kill my daughter or son
  3. No, I would not kill my daughter or son
  4. I decline to answer this question
Obviously, "I decline to answer this question" is not a valid answer. It is merely an easy cop-out to avoid the question.

If the person replies with "No", there can only be one conclusion. He or she is not a Christian, for he or she is required to obey the Lord without question or hesitation.

If the person replies with "I don't know", the person is not a True Christian either, since her or his faith obviously wavers.

For the True Christian, there can only be one answer, a resounding "Yes".

And this is the curious part: I have so far never had anyone answer "Yes" without hesitation. Never.

On the other hand, few of my questions have had more -and often lengthy- different replies that had little or nothing at all to do with the question than this one. Please refer to reference [2] for an example of how self-declared True Believers avoid answering a simple question by throwing up a smoke screen that has nothing to do with the question.

Let's be clear here: the answer to "How much is 1 + 1?" is not "I already told you that massasauga rattlesnakes are a threatened species in Ontario".

It seems that the self-declared True Christian, who is ready and eager to restrict the actions of the non-believer, for example by attempting to ban gay marriage and abortion for all of us [3], is not eager to submit herself or himself to the more brutal consequences of this sinister death cult.

There you have it. The self-declared True Believer, claiming to be convinced, unwilling to confirm it.

And what about you? Are you a Christian? Are you willing to slit the throat of your child when your god asks for it, just to prove your loyalty?

[1] Anonymous, Bible, Genesis, Chapter 22 [retrieved 8 February 2012]
[2] Steve K, Digital Journal, Comment 8 and following [retrieved 8 February 2012]
[3] Michael Foust, Baptist Press, Faith groups unite in 'gay marriage' case [retrieved 8 February 2012]
[4] Several authors, Wikipedia, Northern Ireland [retrieved 8 February 2012]


  1. I've been following the thread on DJ...and I can't imagine that anyone would say that they would kill their child...except for the demented souls who are tortured mentally in the first place.

    You know my feelings about all of this, even though I rarely voice my thoughts (only to you) and we are on common ground...although you have wayyyy more knowledge of the Bible than I have!

    1. That's the thing, isn't it? Christians make all types of strange claims, but when it comes to actually a simple yes or no answer that touches the very core of religion, they are almost always nowhere to be found.

      However, sometimes actions speak louder than words. There are plenty of Christians who do, in fact, willingly sacrifice their children to their god. Many of them are even willing to go to court for the right to do so.

      To me, that is True Belief. I just hope I won't have to look it in the eye any time soon. It scares me silly.